My Nautical Romance

My Nautical Romance, by Miranda Brennan

“Yes, I use all eight of them in my solos. No, I have no ‘adventurous hentai past’. I have a law degree. And I want it on the contract that you guys are aware that I can throttle eight of you simultaneously.”

Atlantic Records did not question Sandy further. It was a shoo-in.

If this was Tumblr, this would be one of those them there re-blogs.

Some context: the image up there is part of a series of illustrations by my inordinately awesome girlfriend, Miranda. If you click on it, you will be taken through to her tumblr, where you will see more of her work.

And now the really important bit:

These illustrations, together with others will be available for sale at New Cross Turn Left this Sunday, the 24th of July, from 1pm to 11pm. You are therefore commanded to show up, and part with your hard-earned cash in exchange for this art, and indeed, the work of many other talented people.

Failure to show up will not be tolerated. The name of the event is also directions for getting there, so you have no excuse. Go to New Cross, Turn Left.

Also, for bonus points, if you could generally link, reblog and otherwise circulate this information, so that people show up to New Cross Turn Left and buy said art, that would be lovely, thank you.

The Wrong Kind Of Snow

In case anyone’s wondering where the link posts have gone, you can blame the FBI. No, seriously. During a raid on a data centre, some incompetent took a server they had no legal right to take (an action for which they will obviously bear no public scrutiny, because that wouldn’t be fair), and the knock-on effect is that it’s killed my link posting until one of the services that runs it if firing on all cylinders again.

I have been trying to formulate a response to this that isn’t just spitting with inarticulate rage at anyone who lives in the US, and is therefore complicit in the criminal activities of their law enforcement agencies, but of course, that’s the anger of powerlessness talking.

My next step is obviously some kind of terrorist action.

8 Rules For Writing Short Fiction

Kurt Vonnegut’s 8 rules for writing short fiction (as listed in Bagombo Snuff Box: Uncollected Short Fiction) were:

  1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.
  2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.
  3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.
  4. Every sentence must do one of two things—reveal character or advance the action.
  5. Start as close to the end as possible.
  6. Be a Sadist. No matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them—in order that the reader may see what they are made of.
  7. Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.
  8. Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To hell with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages.

Were this one of those newfangled blogging systems that the kids all use, this would be listed as a “reblog” from Matt Webb, who has returned to blogging at Interconnected.org, which is good news. I’m not just linking to Mr Webb’s post, because I want to fix these rules firmly in my memory, and in order to be certain that I can find them myself at a later date, unimpeded by the vagaries of the intertubenets.

Onwards!

I feel bad saying this, because I know a lot of my friends have had a bad year, and can’t wait for 2010 to be over, but in all honesty, I’ve had a great year. Absolutely superb.

So, rather than look back and look smug, I shall do what I prefer to do at this time of year, and look forward (and smug).

So, coming up in 2011:

Creative projects a-go-go. Really want to get back on the writing horse this year. Have plan. Plan will go off the rails within a week, but the plan includes this eventuality. Also need to bring 365Bullets to a (semi-)successful conclusion, and probably invent a new photo project.

Health and fitness extravaganza. Back to gym, specific plan in hand. Yes, yes, we all make the resolution. I kinda need to keep it this year. I did very badly at it in 2010, and if I don’t pull my finger out, I’ll never be ready in time for the Olympics.

What?

Social-Life-a-palooza. Erm. I am aware that I have seen much less of a number of very dear friends in 2010 than I did in previous years. I wish to do something about this. Exactly what, I am unsure, especially given that the top two items there are going to eat spare time at a rate, but I’m sure I’ll figure something out.

So, thank you and farewell to 2010, and here’s hoping we all have an awesome 2011.

RSS

Could anyone reading this blog (NB: I’m talking about my blog, not the mirror of it’s content on LJ) via RSS reader either leave a comment or drop me an email (instructions in the website footer) if they see this post? For some reason, my own RSS reader will only show new posts if I delete the feed and re-create it, despite the fact that viewing the source of the feed in my browser shows me an up to date feed. I just want to be sure that this problem isn’t affecting other people. Ta!

Out

Heading away for a much-needed break – spending a week by the sea, with very little internet at best, quite possibly none. (If I really am internet-free, this will be the longest period I’ve been without the intertubes in about ten years.) In any even, I wouldn’t expect any blogging, or anything much in the way of email responses. I might manage the odd twitter. Look after yourselves, and I’ll see you all in a week.

Really Quite Unecessary

Another one from the department of only-of-interest-to-me, but I have spent most of the night writing a little tool to delete the vast swathe of duplicate posts that my shiny new-edition blog dumped back into my LJ. I have no idea if this means that the people who got a swathe of notifications the other day are going to get another swathe – in any event my apologies for one or both sets of pointless email garbage, but with any luck, that’ll be the last of it. And I can go back to playing computer games with my free time, instead of coding.

Plus Ça Change

Or: where to find me, 2010 edition.

So, after years of blogging at umpty-tum different places, I’ve decided not to bother with all that any more. I’m not going to have a linkblog, a photoblog, a writing blog, and a whatever-else blog any more. I’m just going to have one blog. If not all of it’s of interest to you, well, I’m sorry about that, but it’s all of interest to me.

As of today, I go back to blogging at www.black-ink.org. As far as possible, all my myriad old URLs will redirect there, after I’ve had time to make sure that everything is working correctly in my new set up and that I’ve properly mothballed everything at the old URLs.

Further, in the unlikely event that you’re desperate to read stuff I wrote years ago, almost everything I’ve ever blogged is now in the archive there. I’m missing some posts from some time around 2003/2004 when I was using a CMS called nucleus that detonated itself unbacked-up during an upgrade (you can bet I’ve never done that since), but everything else that wasn’t some kind of private post is now back on my blog. (This includes, for example, my old blogger archive from 2000-2002, absent from the intertubes since some time in 2003). Most of it’s only of interest to me and my obsession with continuity, but still, if you didn’t know me ten years ago, and have a burning urge to find out exactly how stupid I was back then, it’s all there in it’s slightly humiliating glory.

(Those of you reading this via livejournal, do not panic (in the unlikely event that my presence, or lack thereof, on livejournal is something you might panic over) – I’ll still be cross-posting everything automatically. Do please bear with me if there are some teething troubles with this new set up, though.)