Self Trepanation For Beginners

I have had a cold all fucking week. I could have done without it in quite a big way. The worst would appear to be over, and my nose has stopped streaming and I am no long feeling quite so much like twice-warmed shit, but I am in total sinus agony at the moment – I am congested to fuck, and no matter how often I blow my nose, I cannot seem to relieve the agonising pressure around my eyes.

Does anyone have any suggestions for things I can do to relieve said pressure, even if it’s just a particularly effective brand of decongestant or method of administering it? Because right now, drilling holes in the front of my face seems like a very attractive option.

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