That’s No Way To Say Goodbye

Well, I had two topics I was going to talk about. And maybe I will come back to the Valentines/relationshippy one later, but right now, it seems a little obvious, and not terribly in the spirit of Valentines day.

So, instead, I am going to look both big-headed and pointlessly neurotic. I’m good like that.

The reason that both these topics are one my mind is that last Thursday night, as well as running into kazzik (who is a) alive, and b) tired, I can report) on my way back from taking photos on the South Bank, I ran into an old chum (Steven, WINOLJ) who I haven’t seen in years, and since he was going back to Morden, we spent the tube journey catching up.

And over the course of the conversation two topics came up that stuck with me. The aforementioned valentines/relationshippy one, and more importantly, the terrible strain of being popular.

Or as he put it “we all thought you just didn’t want to hang out with us any more”. This left me faintly horrified, and made me realise that Steven and associated chums aren’t the only lot I’ve drifted out of touch with over the last few years, not out of any desire to, but simply because I never got around to giving them a call. And now, I have Guilt.

I am a fortunate boy. I have lots of very lovely friends. I count my blessings daily. Well, OK, maybe every other day. I’d never get any angsting done if I counted them daily, and then they’d make me hand back my goth card. (I am reminded of the look on Mr. Diggle’s face the other week when he discovered that papamoomin and I both had Slimelight cards in our wallets. “I thought that goth card thing was just a joke!”)

But it does tend to lead to well, a full social calendar, as I have lamented been smug about on here in the past. I’ve got one free weekend between now and the end of March (and no, I’m not telling you whch one, because one of you bastards will only have gone and been born then, or achieve something requireing celebration that weekend), and my weeknights aren’t much better.

God, how awful is it to be me, eh?

But of course the flipside of being terribly popular and nigh-universally adored everywhere I go is that I just don’t have the time to see everyone. And it’s a character flaw, I know, but I tend to make the time to see those who bother to invite me places. Who get in touch and say “hey, haven’t seen you in a while, fancy a drink/meal/debauched bacchanal?” (That last one doesn’t happen a lot for some reason.)

And yes, I know that friendships are a two way street and I should make the time and etc etc. Like Li Kao, there is a slight flaw in my character, and it is a combination of chronic laziness and being easily distracted. So I tend to wind up just going along with whoever shouts loudest/waves the most interesting looking shiny thing. I am bad at keeping track of who I haven’t seen/remembered to get in touch with. So I can quite easily drift out of touch with people.

My point is twofold. One, I am hoping to administer a kick up my own arse, to encourage me to get in touch with people I haven’t seen in ages. Kicking my own arse requires me to look slightly stupid in public, and I think should more than accomplish that. Secondly, for the benefit of anyone else who has ever thought similar things about me, it’s not true. I am not terribly inclined to suddenly decide that I want to stop hanging out with people, unless something fairly drastic involving bloodshed happens. I’m just y’know, busy. Give me a call, drop me an email, come up with specific plans, rather than just a genereic “it’d be nice to see you at some point”, and I will be more than delighted to arrange to spend time with you. It may be in a month or so’s time, but still…

See? Big-headed and pointlessly neurotic. You were warned.

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