Topic #2: Compliments and self image.
This one’s just been on my mind, as anyone who reads this on a half-way regular basis will know. Why is it that pretty much without exception, none of my friends will believe it when I pay them a compliment? This really gets on my wick, this one does. I’m not a liar. I’m not mad. All joking aside, I’m not a freak or a muant. I’m not just saying these things to make them feel better, or because I want something. This is what I really think. And if I think it, I’m sure other people do, too.
Actually, that’s not entirely true: I do want something. I want to make my friends feel good about themselves. Which will, in turn, make me feel good about myself. So yes, I do want something. But I think I could be forgiven that ulterior motive, to be honest.
I appreciate that compliments often make people feel awkward or uncomfortable, which is why I don’t generally push it. And I know I can be just as bad, don’t get me wrong. But in the last week, no less than four people have basically said “It’s nice that you think that, but I’m not going to pay attention because XXXX”, or even just an outright “No, that’s not true.” I’m starting to wonder why if these people are willing to take me seriously in other ways and think my opinion might have some value on other matters, they cannot believe that I might not be right when I say something nice about them. And yeah, I write this knowing at at least two of them read this from time to time – you know fine well who you are, and you know fine well what I’ve said in the past, and still hold to be true. I’m sorry if you feel I’m not being honest with you, or whatever other reason you have for not listening to me today.
I just wish you bloody well would, now and again.