O Tempora! O Mores!

The branch of Sainsburys local to my work is selling mass produced “wall art” for a fiver a pop. It’s fucking hideous sub-pikea horrorshow stuff.

(Naturally I have bought some. Helpfully, it comes with a large sheet of cardboard. Now all I need is a can of spray paint, and an idea.)

Also inspired by my trip to Sainos: Porn Words

I had a chicken and tomato sandwich for lunch. But this wasn’t just any chicken and tomato sandwich, no. This was “Juicy Pieces of Sunblush ® tomato in a light mayonnaise with succulent slices of chicken, vine ripened tomatoes, spinach and basil on malted bread with seeds”. My sandwich is now being described in the breathy pre-orgasmic tones of an M&S add.

Let’s strip the porn words from that sentence, shall we?

“Juicy pieces of Sunblush ® tomato in a light mayonnaise with succulent slices of chicken, vine ripened tomatoes, spinach and basil on malted bread with seeds”

Or: “Tomato in mayonnaise with chicken, spinach and basil on bread”

One of these accurately describes the sensation what I had. Would you like to guess which? (And frankly, that’s generous.)

Porn Words: Pointless bits of linguistic padding designed to make you feel that an orgasm is in the offing.

Posted on by Alasdair 0

Aaah, globalisation

I have just bought Australian Wine from a German website, to be shipped to the UK, and paid in dollars.

On the bright side, I paid in dollars, so it was cheap.

Posted on by Alasdair 0

[Book And Album Reviews] Week 4

Running a little late here, so a couple of very short reviews for last week’s stuff.

This week’s book(s): Still Life / Havock Junction / Shrike all by Joe Donelly

Donelly does a sort of celtic horror – the stories are generally set in Scotland, and rooted in (heavily fictionalised) myths and legends about ancient Druids and witchcraft. I still think his first book, Bane, that I read many years ago, is his best, but these three did manage to keep me nicely entertained for a week or so. While his books have common elements – he’s particularly fond of slapping a love story into them, and his works do tend to be written from a default position of of Decent Man looking after Capable-But-Still-In-Need-Of-Rescuing Woman – the books are different enough not not feel entirely like you’ve read the same thing from him before.

I would heartily recommend Bane to anyone, and of these three, I think Still Life was the strongest.

This week’s music: A to Z of Classical Music by Various Artists

Nope, still can’t do it. I do like this stuff, but it completely fails to command even a fraction of my attention. Were I buy classical music in a serious manner, I’d need to buy it, and sit doing nothing but listening to it. Which isn’t unreasonable, except that that’s not how I listen to music – I’m almost always doing something else with music playing, but I do like to be aware of the music, and with this, I’m just not – I might as well be sitting silence. Once in a blue moon, I’ll lie in bed and just listen, but even then, I want something that’s not going to let me drift into thinking about other stuff. I feel like a bit of a philistine, but there you go. Anyway, I’ve always got the jazz collection to prove that I do in fact listen to music for grown ups when the mood takes me.

Posted on by Alasdair 0

Photo development help

Can anyone recommend me a place to get 120 film developed, or even just a guide as to how much I should pay? My local shop are charging me around the 20 quid mark for a roll of 16, plus a set of 6×4 prints and a digital copy.

And while I’m paying it as a one off, if this is the regular price, then I don’t expect I’ll be doing it terribly often, since that’s about the same price as I paid for the bloody camera.

(Anyone saying “learn to print your own” will be laughed at. While I wouldn’t mind, I think my housemates might object to my turning our toilet into a darkroom.)

Posted on by Alasdair 0

A request

Tell me about examples of good design that you’ve seen recently.

I don’t just mean functional, or informative – in fact, I don’t give much of damn about what the thing does or is. I want you to show me examples of something that you thing is really cool, visually cutting edge, and still clear and comprehensible.

Adverts, websites, t-shits, whatever. I just want a wash of fresh design stuff that I haven’t seen.

(I really really must sort out that subscription to Creative Review.)

Posted on by Alasdair 0

Obsession

Reading an article this morning, The Design Disease, reminded me of something I’ve long held to be true – that while you or I might create Art now and again, it’s not the same thing as the urge to be an Artist. (Or in this case Designer.)

Everyone I know who has become a successful (by which I mean: makes their living doing it, and receives at least modest acclaim from their peers in the field) creative type has one thing in common – brain damage. They’re obsessed with their field. I swear to god, I could go round my friends with creative aspirations, and point fingers saying “will make it”, “Will do a few bits and bobs, might make a modest living”, “no chance”, purely on the basis of the level of their obsession. I’d be right about 95% of the time.

It’s a long documented thing, the thin line between Artist’s gift and madness. But the thing I find most interesting is the idea that it can be taught. You can make yourself an obsessive, with a brain that is optimised to do certain things, and you will do better than your contemporaries. All you need to do is be willing to sacrifice a bit of your normal human function in exchange. For some people, this is no contest at all. Others, they hold a bit of themselves back, in fear.

Posted on by Alasdair 0

Whoops.

In a move that is obviously all the fault of [info]hirez, I appear to have accidentally bought myself one of them there lomo things – specifically, a Holga. And some slide film, for purposes of cross-processing.

Still, it was all cheap on eBay.

So, adventures in non-digital photography to follow.

Posted on by Alasdair 0

City Dweller

City Dweller

The first appearance of cross-processing on this blog. This is a technique where normal colour film is processed with the chemicals that are supposed to be used on slide film, or vice versa. Obviously, I do it with a photoshop filter, but the effect is the same – slightly unreal colours, and a sort of dirty sharpness that plays into the effect I’m after here.

That’s probably all I’ve got from Exit – there are a couple more shots I’m still playing with, but I’m not sure I’m going to be able to make anything of them.

Posted on by Alasdair 0